Chet Collins

The start of something exciting.

Texas Governor Lifts Covid-19 Mask Mandate, Business Restrictions - WSJ

“Removing state mandates does not end personal responsibility,” he said.

Why is this the last line of the article?

This is the crux of Abbott’s argument. People should take personal responsibility of their own accord, not because of some indefinite governmental emergency authority.

It’s interesting to see all of the backlash. Some argue that because the state government says that masks are no longer required, many people will wrongly think its okay to stop wearing their mask in public.

Many of the people making that argument take the exact opposite position on the legality of recreational drug use. They say that if local governments remove criminal penalities for Schedule 1 narcotics, it won’t encourage more people to use drugs. No one ever mentions that the usage of these drugs remains illegal under Federal law.

Right or wrong, our legal code does signal a form of morality to society.

Dr. Suess’s If I Ran the Zoo will no longer be published or sold.

That title was a Caldecott Honor winner.

Texas Removes Mask Mandate To Scare All The Californians Away - The Babylon Bee

The Governor explains that in these trying times, extreme measures must be taken to stop the spread of Californians into Texas and to scare them off from ever wanting to return.

Dozens Of Bible Verses Come Forward To Accuse Joel Osteen Of Abuse - The Babylon Bee

Verses from books ranging from Genesis and Exodus all the way to Jude and Revelation have spoken out, saying that Osteen abused them, exploited them, and heartlessly ripped them out of context for years.

Report: Women In Hell Still Trying To Turn Up The Thermostat - The Babylon Bee

Men have given thought to turning the thermostat down, but they’ve decided they’d rather deal with the heat than the whining.

I’m very excited about Ulysses.app adding support for publishing to Micro.blog.

I almost switched to iaWriter when they rolled out that feature. Glad that I didn’t!

Here Are The 8 Most Electrifying Moments From Trump’s CPAC Speech - The Babylon Bee

The epic reading 6 weeks worth of Tweets Trump never got to send: He did this for the first 45 minutes of his speech

Man Waits To Form Opinion On All Major Issues Until Corporate Brands Weigh In - The Babylon Bee

At publishing time, Zwygart had begun refreshing Arby’s Twitter feed to see what they had to say about the bombing of Syria.

Banks in Germany Tell Customers to Take Deposits Elsewhere - WSJ

Germany’s biggest lenders, Deutsche Bank AG and Commerzbank AG, have told new customers since last year to pay a 0.5% annual rate to keep large sums of money with them.

Banks really hate their customers.

Big day.

‘Hosanna! Hosanna!’ Trump Triumphantly Rides Into CPAC On Back Of A Donkey - The Babylon Bee

Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of MAGA!

Proud Obama Awards His Nobel Peace Prize To Biden For Bombing Syria - The Babylon Bee

Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize in 2009 – the first time the prize was awarded to someone simply for existing. He then made sure all bombs and missiles had written on them, “From Nobel Peace Prize Winner Barack Obama,” so people knew they weren’t being incinerated by some heartless warmonger.

Trump Promises To Give Everyone $2,001 Checks If He’s Elected President Again - The Babylon Bee

Sleepy Joe promised a $2,000 stimulus, and where is it? Total disgrace. Too busy bombing people in Syria maybe, who knows! Everyone knows I would do a better job of passing stimulus than Sleepy Joe. I’ll even do better! $2,001 dollars! How does that sound?

Absentminded Joe Biden Accidentally Mails Stimulus Checks To Defense Contractors Instead Of Americans - The Babylon Bee

Biden quickly called the defense contractors to get the checks returned, but it was too late, as they had already cashed them, purchased a bunch of bombs, and shipped them over to the Middle East to get dropped on Syria.

Three Republicans Thrown Into Fiery Furnace For Not Bowing Down To Trump Statue - The Babylon Bee

At publishing time, Republicans were shocked to see a fourth man standing in the fire with them: Mike Pence.

Biden Clarifies That Stimulus Checks Are ‘Just An Idea’ - The Babylon Bee

They’re more of a metaphor. You might say the real stimulus checks were just the countries we bombed along the way, Jack. The real stimulus checks, ya see, they were inside us all along.