Chet Collins

‘I’ve Been Selfish And Arrogant, And I Apologize,’ Says Content, Mentally Healthy Trump Minutes After Social Media Ban

At press time, Trump was overheard asking House Speaker Nancy Pelosi if she had ever noticed how beautiful a simple goldfinch was, while suggesting the two of them go birding together in the Adirondacks after he left office.

Trump Begins Throwing Pence’s Belongings Out Of Window Onto White House Lawn - The Babylon Bee

At publishing time, someone had also keyed the Vice Presidential Cadillac and TP’ed the trees at One Observatory Circle.

Trump Sneaks Back On Twitter By Disguising Self As PR Rep For Chinese Communist Party - The Babylon Bee

Trump is reportedly attempting to build a following by tweeting about how good Uighur concentration camps are and how nice the Chinese government is, since those things are not banned under Twitter’s terms of service.

After Being Kicked Off Social Media, Trump Forced To Go Door To Door And Shout ‘RIGGED ELECTION!’ - The Babylon Bee

“Nothing– and I mean nothing, will stop me from getting my important message out to the American people,” said Trump.

Using Apple Watch for macOS administrator approval is very nice.

Apple Threatens to Ban Parler From App Store as Twitter Bans Donald Trump - MacRumors

We have received numerous complaints regarding objectionable content in your Parler service, accusations that the Parler app was used to plan, coordinate, and facilitate the illegal activities in Washington D.C. on January 6, 2021 that led (among other things) to loss of life, numerous injuries, and the destruction of property.

Big Tech sticks together!

This exact language could’ve been used to threaten dozens of other big apps used by ISIS, other domestic terrorists, and autocrats abroad. Didn’t happen, though.

Hat tip to the brave corporate leaders at Twitter!

They took the bold step of banning President Trump from their platform and told the world on a Friday afternoon after markets closed for the weekend.

Courage!

Y’all got any Robot food?

Puss in Boots

🍿

Liberals Tell Everyone To Calm Down About The Siege Since The Capitol Has Insurance - The Babylon Bee

“I can’t believe everyone is getting so worked up over some property damage,” said liberal pundit Howard Collier. “The Capitol has insurance, and all of that can get replaced. What we should be doing is trying to understand what made these people so angry in the first place.”

WSJ reporting:

Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D., Mass.), in a tweet Thursday, accused Mrs. DeVos of quitting rather than supporting efforts to invoke the 25th Amendment to remove Mr. Trump.

We are in a real moment for members of both parties to assume the best in one another so we can solve this problem constructively. Yet people are still resisting that urge.

They’ve hated Betsy DeVos since day one and even now, when she nobly quits her job in protest, they still assume the worst in her.

A Trump administration official disputed Mrs. Warren’s claim. “When it became very clear that the 25th was not an option, this was the strongest stance Mrs. DeVos could take to uphold her oath to defend the constitution," the official said.

Pelosi Says Democrats Will Move to Impeach Trump if He Doesn’t Leave - WSJ

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D., Calif.), in calling for the impeachment of President Trump, also questioned Mr. Trump’s fitness for office in the letter, saying she had spoken to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Army Gen. Mark Milley on Friday “to discuss available precautions for preventing an unstable president from initiating military hostilities or accessing the launch codes and ordering a nuclear strike.”

Things are bad, but having this call and then leaking to the press is just political theater. Not the time for games when you’re trying to assert that you’re the grown-up in the room.

Biden Plans to Release Nearly All Available Covid-19 Vaccine Doses - WSJ

a shift from the Trump administration’s policy of holding back stock for second doses.

An interesting idea, but it kind of feels like buying something on a credit card and hoping that your paycheck clears before the bill comes due.

Stop trying to make the Capitol riot into a race issue - Washington Examiner

There will always be those who hijack deadly serious events to talk about the issues that are clearly more important to them.

I saw this question raised with many outlets. My reading of the totality of publicly available information is that government officials lowered the police presence based on the mistaken belief that a large law enforcement showing leads to violence, not the anticipated racial makeup of the crowd.

I think the most reasonable explanation for the lack of use of force can be explained by 10 months of national debate on the appropriateness of use of force. In fact, the restraint shown by US Capitol Police after the breach may be one of the more troubling storylines of the day.

The Capitol Cops and Rioters - WSJ

Americans watched as far-left radicals rioted in many cities, including D.C., attacking police officers and damaging federal property. Democratic leaders were slow to condemn this violence, and progressive prosecutors have been reluctant to press charges against many participants. All of this contributes to a culture of impunity around political violence and emboldens bad actors.

Insurrection Demands Forceful Response - WSJ

Some liberals appear to have shed their reservations about the use of force now that the mob carries different signs and chants different slogans. Some of the same pundits who called roughly half the country “fascists” last year for thinking troops may be necessary to restore order now ask where the troops were on Wednesday. Perhaps they’ve learned the lesson that political violence leads to more political violence.

Sen. Cotton’s point: all insurrection, regardless of affiliation, must be snuffed out under the full weight of law.

Actions by Police Before Trump Supporters Attacked Capitol Backfired Spectacularly - WSJ

In a letter to federal officials on Monday, Washington Mayor Muriel Bowser urged federal law enforcement to maintain a light footprint for Wednesday’s protests, seeking to avoid the type of show of force that had inflamed tense situations in the city last year.

Donald Trump’s Final Days - WSJ

It is best for everyone, himself included, if he goes away quietly.

Trump Circumvents Twitter Ban With Emergency Alert System - The Babylon Bee

“The Apprentice just is not as good since I left. Very sad to see the end of a once-great show. Sad!”

Trump Suspended Indefinitely From Facebook Amid Pressure on Social Media to Clamp Down - WSJ

Danielle Citron, a professor at the University of Virginia Law School and longtime member of Twitter’s Trust and Safety board, has previously argued in favor of suspending Mr. Trump’s account, citing harm to public health and U.S. democracy.

Perhaps Trump could suggest that he was merely saber rattling.

Trump’s Trumpian Final Days - WSJ

The conventional wisdom is to blame all this on Mr. Trump for making “baseless claims” about the election. A more honest assessment of the damage done during Mr. Trump’s four years in office would require everyone in politics to take a long look in the mirror.

We can get through this, if we embrace humility.

One may ask: What has been more damaging to Americans’ trust in their political system—the low-rent QAnon fantasy or the white-shoe conspiracy of the Steele dossier?

South Korea Pushes Iran to Release Seized Oil Tanker - WSJ

“We are not hostage takers,” Iran’s government spokesman, Ali Rabiee, said the day after the tanker was seized.

I could never be a spokesman.