Chet Collins

Kanye Promises Free Chick-Fil-A For Every American If Elected - Babylon Bee

“If you vote for me, you’re gonna have that delicious number one with the lemonade”

I’m in.

Police Reform Wasn’t the Only Big Change in Camden - WSJ

While word has gotten out about Camden’s successful police reforms, its similarly successful school reforms have received considerably less attention in the mainstream media.

Sunday breakfast.

Academic Project Used Marketing Data to Monitor Russian Military Sites - WSJ

The researchers’ experiment underscores how the global marketing industry’s practice of collecting and reselling reams of user data, often for marketing and advertising purposes, can be turned toward other ends. The data can be easily purchased and exploited by foreign and domestic national-security agencies, law-enforcement officials and others for surveillance and monitoring.

Another reason why users should rejoice as new system level privacy protections are released and whenever advertisers object and complain.

Blaze at Iranian Port Adds to String of Damaging Incidents - WSJ

The fire at Bushehr’s Delvar Shipyard follows a series of incidents that have damaged facilities connected to Iran’s nuclear and missile programs and other important infrastructure. Bushehr, which lies on the Persian Gulf coast, is a key hub for Iran’s oil industry and home to the Bushehr Nuclear Power Plant.

One imagines that the strength of internal security services in Iran would preclude a campaign like this from being possible. And yet, here we are.

As $600-a-Week Jobless Aid Nears End, Congress Faces a Quandary - WSJ

A University of Chicago study found 68% of unemployed workers who are eligible for benefits receive more in jobless payments than their lost earnings

The fatal flaw.

Ms. Lee said the restaurant where she worked hasn’t reopened, but she wouldn’t feel comfortable going back to work if it did, because she fears getting sick there and passing the illness to her children.

Lee, a chef, makes 54% more unemployed than employed. You can’t blame her for wanting the benefits extended, but her fear of passing COVID-19 to her teenage kids is overstated.

as states moved to reopen their economies, some employers said they faced difficulties because many workers receiving jobless benefits could make more money staying home, while avoiding costs such as child care and transportation.

Summer showers while washing the cars.

Chicago White Sox To Drop Offensive ‘White’ From Name - The Babylon Bee

At this news, gang leaders across the Windy City laid down their weapons, and all crime and oppression disappeared overnight. 

NBA Now Requiring All Players To Wear Masks Depicting Chinese Flag - The Babylon Bee

“This is about keeping our players safe and keeping the money flowing in from China.”

Trump Administration Weighs Troop Cut in South Korea - WSJ

This, and the cut in Germany, is silly.

The cost sharing issue is negligible. This is a whole lot cheaper than the US having to pay full price to maintain a presence overseas.

The opportunity to serve (& travel!) abroad is a huge draw for the military. Not to mention our ability to keep ties between armies at a constant level of readiness.

Then, of course, there’s the logistical pre-staging of manpower and equipment for rapid deployment to hot spots.

My two year old just appeared in the living room holding the supplies to make lunch.

I guess she’s hungry.

It took a 3rd party logistics company 16 days to ship a small parcel 885 miles.

And that’s why companies shouldn’t look to “save money” by using non-traditional shippers.

I enjoy a good avocado.

Using Our Prophetic Powers For Good: The Babylon Bee Will Now Only Write Articles About Positive Things Happening To Humanity - The Babylon Bee

Over the past few years, we have noticed a disturbing trend in our satire: it comes true. In the beginning, we thought it was just coincidence, but as the fulfilled prophecies continued to stack up, we came to accept the truth. We here at the Babylon Bee have been given the gift of prophetic vision, and it’s time to use that spiritual gift for the good of mankind.

‘This Ain’t It, Chief’ Updated To ‘This Ain’t It, Noble Indigenous Tribal Leader’ - The Babylon Bee

The popular internet comment response “This ain’t it, chief,” has been rightfully seen by many as problematic for years as it appropriates Native American culture in a derisive way, using the word “chief,” which everybody knows is an offensive term. Native Americans have spent countless hours weeping since it was first coined.

Not sure why emoji have to be part of a massive social engineering & conditioning project. You can’t even hide the ones that you never use.

For the first time in 3 years, my power is out.

Heck of a run.

Pixelmator finally types text on a path.

Why, oh why, did it take this long?

Widespread Twitter Hack Reaches Bill Gates, Kanye West, Elon Musk, Joe Biden and Barack Obama - WSJ

Twitter, late Wednesday, said it believed the hackers perpetrated the attack by targeting employees who had access to the company’s internal systems and tools.

Not even strong password management and 2FA can protect you. Kind of makes you wonder what the next step in digital security is.

“Tough day for us at Twitter. We all feel terrible this happened,” Chief Executive Jack Dorsey tweeted

Also, Twitter is terrible.

The breadth of the attack and Twitter’s struggle to bring it under control made it one of the most extensive security failures for Twitter, raising questions about a social platform that has attained a central place in political, cultural and business communication.

Russian Hackers Blamed for Attacks on Coronavirus Vaccine-Related Targets - WSJ

U. S. and U.K. government officials said a prominent state-backed Russian hacking group is responsible for ongoing cyberattacks against organizations involved in the development of coronavirus vaccines

At what point do we totally ice Russia? I’m talking about sanctions that go seven steps past “withering.”

Business Owner Charged With Hate Crime For Painting Over BLM Graffiti On His Storefront - The Babylon Bee

Drake said he was just “cleaning up vandalism,” which is a well-known racist dog whistle.