Chet Collins

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  • Assad Returns To Ophthalmology At Moscow LensCrafters - The Onion

    At press time, Assad was threatening the front desk receptionist with sarin gas after she made a mistake with the scheduling software.

    December 13,2024
  • Meeting the new neighbors.

    Deer in the yard
    December 12,2024
  • Catholic Husband

    Nothing to Do - Catholic Husband

    As an at-home dad, I feel the pressure to be my children’s cruise director, curating activities to fill their day. There’s a time and a place for that, but there’s also plenty of benefit to them having nothing to do.

    ➕

    December 9,2024
  • Suspicious? Biden Pardons Hunter For Anything He Might Do Tonight Between 2:30 and 4:17 AM Outside The Capitol Heights Applebee’s - Babylon Bee

    “I hereby exempt my son from anything that may or may not occur at this very specific time behind the green dumpster outside Applebees,” said Biden to a bust of Teddy Roosevelt he mistook for a reporter.

    December 5,2024
  • End of an era.

    Tree with red leaves against a blue sky
    December 5,2024
  • Seven years ago, the bozos at Equifax had a massive data breach in which the attackers spent weeks in their networks and databases completely undetected.

    They hoovered up my information, without compensation or consent, and then left the backdoor open for thieves to steal it all in one fell swoop.

    The fine folks at the plaintiffs bar negotiated a settlement that would pay victims up to $125, depending on the size of the claim.

    My settlement payment came through this morning: $7.44 on a virtual gift card.

    December 4,2024
  • Elon Musk’s Multibillion-Dollar Tesla Pay Package Rejected by Judge Again - WSJ

    McCormick said the plaintiff, a Tesla shareholder named Richard Tornetta, was entitled to $345 million in either cash or Tesla shares.

    RIP Delaware

    December 2,2024
  • Catholic Husband

    Arrival - Catholic Husband

    Advent is a time of distraction, holy distraction. There’s plenty to do, and more that still needs to be done, but everywhere we look, everywhere we go, and everything we hear all calls our hearts back to the true joy of the season; the arrival.

    ➕

    December 2,2024
  • Israel Asks Hezbollah To Please Wait By Pagers For Message Announcing Start Of Ceasefire - Babylon Bee

    “The print will be very small, so maybe hold the pager close to your face,” suggested Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu. “Hold it with both hands to keep it steady. If you’re concerned you’ll miss the notice, try keeping the pager held tightly against your ear.”

    November 27,2024
  • Walking The Walk: Elon Musk Has Fired Himself From The Department Of Government Efficiency For Using Social Media On The Job - Clickhole

    “Useless, ineffective federal workers who squander as much of their daily life on social media as I do have no business taking up resources funded by American taxpayers,” continued Musk in a series of posts on X, applauding his own decision to fire himself as a perfect first step towards “draining the D.C. swamp,” as President Trump has vowed.

    I hope he land on his feet!

    November 27,2024
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