Unsettling: Your Amazon Package Came Too Fast - Clickhole

Someone worked through the night to make sure you had shampoo at your front door by the break of dawn. Yes, you—you, who definitely could have just gone to the store for it, but instead had everyone running around like this was a rapid-fire organ delivery for a lifesaving transplant.

Furious Trump Imposes 1000% Tariff On Supreme Court - Babylon Bee

“If you want your tariff rate to be zero, you have to let me use tariffs,” Trump reportedly told Chief Justice John Roberts in a heated exchange.

I guess today was the real Liberation Day after all.

Lucy approaches the iMac after practicing her poem. Benedict and Veronica join her.

Did you finish your poem?

Lucy: “Yes.”

What is the title and the author?

Lucy: “The Snail by William Cowper.”

Benedict: “By William Caterpillar.”

He wrote it so long ago, he’s now William Butterfly.

Trump Orders Drone Strike On Venezuelan Olympic Cross-Country Skier - Babylon Bee

“What an explosive finish for Claveau-Laviolette,” she added. “Wow!”

Morning blend.

☕️

Big day.

❤️

I love a good heated steering wheel.